The poem below is one I wrote a while ago, I decided to post it on this blog to buy me some time and to explain the background of my blog name.
Motto of the day: don't do anything that I would do
xoxo

Adamant Angst - revised edtion

Is it my mindset
My lack of control
The way I live
Life in my soul
Deep and hidden
But mostly exposed
Memories ridden
Can’t be composed
Without sedatives
My lovers, I’m
Too competitive
Too eager to be on top
That when I’m low
I cannot escape
I cannot just go
Somewhere easier, no
I have to wallow
In self condolence
Self assurance
Self pity
Whilst I hit head first
In frustration
At this negativity
Surging from my veins
I deserve it
I deserve to feel pain

Is this exasperating
Irritating
Infuriating?
Vexing
Irksome
This galling person
Wasting her life away
Grating her life
Into small, thin pieces,
Transparent and trying?
Do you just want
To stand up, scream
Because she won’t listen
She won’t give up
This trivial pursuit
Of spiraling quail
Just cowers over happiness
And showers in misery
Habitual chronic behavior

And here’s my apology
It’s not your liability
You’ve been good
You understood
When the rules of life
Were being read out
You took notes
Whilst they breathed
Down our throats
I praise you for your
sufficiency your
Excellency
I glorify you for your
Potency
Dexterity
Don’t mind me
And my envy

So come on then
Arbitrate
Adjudicate
Referee
Intercede
But it’s not your post
So just know
I love you
Wish I could hold you
But I’ve already told you
To stay back
To let me
Deteriorate
Disintegrate
Is it too late
To acquiesce your submission?

How did you escape
Adolescent bars
Men from mars
And arrive in top condition?

How do you manage
To ameliorate
Any stone that is thrown
Into your face
I’ll skewer this ambiance
Someone please will you
Call an ambulance
She’s insane
Something’s wrong with
Her adolescent brain
There is sense
Jolt!
Bolt
From the blue!
And it’s all thanks to you
My Adamant Angst
Subsides to glue.

Sydney is Seriously Saucy: Part Two

AH HAH. At last she gets herself together and writes the long anticipated second part. Uni. Right, well if you have talked to me recently then no doubt you have heard the entire sob story about my scary stalker. I would like to announce to him, as he very much could be reading this (though he would most likely be far too stupid to know what a blog is) that he should be kicked out of the building, now. Seriously though, what really happened was I rejected him and then he sent me these really horrible text messages and now I see him everywhere. There was a really strange call yesterday on my phone from a private number and it told me to go to the housing service to check up on some details so off I went and there he was. Suddenly the poor housing service had to be deprived of my details.

Anyway, last night I went to the Mardi Gras party for the resident students, ignored my stalker and bailed early to go to a broadway jazz dance lesson. One word: hot. Sydney really is seriously saucy.

I'm going to skim past all the O week stuff as quickly as I can. Please fasten your seat belts and put on your safety helmets with torches on the top.

Being late. First lesson I learnt at uni was, in my own mother's words: "the sign of a true uni student is that they can wake up after class starts and still get there on time!" First day of orientation and I was running an hour late but I still managed to arrive just as it was starting. You do the maths.

Plagiarism. If I have to hear that stupid word ever again... I swear it's the only word they know, you know them, the people that stand up and use plagiarised cliches to tell you not plagiarise.

Fluro name tags. We were all plastered with stickers with our name on them, colour coded for our different faculties. This was cleverly done as we were all gawking at each other's chests with such eloquence. During the morning tea break there was alot of awkward standing around looking for people with the same colour name tag as you. I found this process incredibly amusing, there were some girls in particular who looked so self conscious I thought they'd melt into a puddle. The boys were mostly in big awkward groups in which they'd all be looking over their shoulers, hand in their pockets and trying to appear like they have something better to do that they are currently not doing.

Joining clubs. On the Wednesday - the big O Day - which for some reason always reminds me of a donut, we were all salvaged on our paths to destruction by many stalls of people trying to get us to join their loving clubs. My favourites were: the pamphlet club, the australasian chinese european christian club, the young socialists (as they had a disagreement with one of my friends, true humour never fades) and the chocolate appreciation club.

Sore heads. Right, orientation at uni is quite often associated with getting smashed in order to get to know the other students. Trivia night was awesome, we came third, as half our team were sober. The "Historic and Cultural tour of the rocks" i.e the Pub Crawl was pretty good too. Then on friday night an 18th birthday party in which the host was so incredibly friendly he would get the girls to sit on his lap in order to ensure their comfort.

That's it. Glad that's over, it was starting to sound a bit aggressive.

First week of classes: My classes are awesome, 12 hours of class a week and a great timetable mostly of afternoon classes.

One more thing before I dissapear into the black abyss:

My flat mate is really nice, she is in her second year so she knows all the ropes and is very friendly.

Now I will leave you to ponder the answer to life, the universe and everything.

xoxo

Sydney is Seriously Saucy (part one)

YESTERDAY mother bear and I rose from our sleeping places at 5:15AM in order to arrive in Sydney by 10:00AM, only to find that unlike the small, modest city where we started our epic journey, Sydney had streets. (Exaggeration is an art form, and I can't draw or paint so I exaggerate to compensate. I don't know if you noticed, but in that sentence I managed to simultaneously exaggerate and understate. This is a proud moment). Mum and I had absolutely no idea where the building that I needed to go to was, so we asked a cab driver and he, feeling particularly charitable and reckless with his time and money, took us there by getting us to drive behind his car. We followed him and he accepted my offer of marriage when we arrived just on time. I went into the building and found another girl who looked as lost as I did. We worked out that we were both there for the same reason so we went up in the lift together. It only took a few minutes for us to realise we were on the right floor to begin with so off we trotted back down and became official uni students, standing in cues, filling out forms and choosing subjects. I also met another girl who is doing the same course as me and we went through the online enrolment and timetable thing together, which I'm telling you, is a real bonding experience. Not only was it completely and utterly baffling, it was also completely and utterly straight forward, so we laughed and cried and became life long buddies. I can almost remember her name, so that's a start. That sounded horrible, but anyone that knows me will know I am terrible at names, unless someone is called Bob. I am really good at Bobs.
TOMORROW ON SYDNEY IS SERIOUSLY SAUCY: I MEET MY ROOM MATE AND NEW ABODE. STAY TUNED.

Frozen Peas - the saviour of the world

YESTERDAY was a bad day. I'm not talking anything serious, or even remotely worth sympathy. Yet it is enough for me to whinge about for a bit on my beloved, deprived blog.

Firstly, I woke up and immediately had an argument with my mother, which is incredibly unusual as the only thing that has ever annoyed me about the woman that gave me life is that she has better legs than I do. Now I should have taken the argument as a sign. I should have retired at that very moment and returned to bed for another 24 hours of sleep. Yet I have never been known for my common sense, and I have slightly insomniac tendencies.
I will now attempt to describe the most dramatic point of the day, yet please take note of two things before I go on:

1. If the image I describe to you below makes you snigger, laugh or giggle, please resist to tell me about this.
2. I am using my blogging rights to change a few details in the true story below in order to protect the strands of dignity that I may have.
Are we clear? Good. Let us proceed.

At around 10:30AM I was putting up an extremely heavy plank of wood attached to two and a half metre long venetian blinds whilst standing on a ladder on the highest step. I had managed to set the wood into place and pulled the string on the curtains to make sure it would stay up. It didn't. The plank of wood hit me directly on the top of my head, hitting my metal headband, digging into my skull. The shock pushed me back, and I fell off the ladder onto the ceramic tiling of our loungeroom floor.

I started crying, as I realised that I had previously turned back the offer for carpeting our floor and for some reason not known to any humans or aliens in this universe, I climbed back onto the ladder in extreme pain, and tried to put the beam back. Yet as tears were in my eyes at that moment, and as mentioned I lack all aspects of common sense, I stood up on the ladder and banged my head on the roof on the same place as the beam had fallen. My headband, feeling that its job had been gloriously fulfilled, i.e, injuring me with such success, snapped in half and fell to the floor. Thankfully I had enough brain cells left to allow me to climb down the ladder and stumble to the phone to ring my mother, as I was alone in the house at the time.
Mum, still angry at me for our argument, didn't want to talk to me so she angrily said she'd ring me back later. However, after hearing my shameful sobs on the other end of the line started worrying and raised her voice to ask what was wrong.
Next thing I know, I was cleaning windows with a packet of frozen peas on my head. Mum was getting increasingly concerned after hearing the whole story and coming back an hour after the fall to see me cleaning windows, so she asked me who the prime minister of Australia is. "Mum, I'm not concussed. It is John Howard." Concerned swear words followed as Mum prayed that Kevin Rudd hadn't really won the election.
Next thing I know, Mum was holding my hands against her cheeks freaking out because they were freezing cold, even though it was 28 degrees outside.
Throughout the rest of the day Mum kept asking how my extremities were, and I kept asking what my extremeties are.

At around 5:30PM I was feeling better, just couldn't really smile or frown because the bruise on my head would hurt. Taking the foccacia out of the oven that Mum had previously neglected in favour of watering the lettuce world in our garden, the index finger of my right hand hit the side of the 210 degree oven and suddenly my finger turned bright red. Judging from the scream that ensued, my poor Mother and her nerves raced inside and dumped my hand into a holy ice bucket. I assure you, with complete and utter confidence in the facts, that the frozen peas felt worthless.

Yet please do not worry my fellow bloggers, as from my experience, a bad day is always followed by an extremely good day.
TODAY is as such, a good day, and the only traces of yesterday left on me are this post, a small burn blister on the tip of my finger, and a rather large bump on the top of my head underneath my blessed hair.

If you have successfully made it to this point of the post I congradulate you and applaud you for your resilience, yet reprimand you for your apparent lack of self-discipline in stopping yourself whilst you were safely in the first sentence.

xoxo

Returning to power

Yes, have no fear, I am back. I have returned to my blogging throne after temporarily renouncing my title. The reason for this dramatic comeback? Well I am doing a communications and writing course at Uni, so I thought that if I couldn't sit down and right a gut wrenching post on my blog then...you fill in the gaps. See, what a great writer I am, one that doesn't finish the sentence. I will supress my sarcasm and explore the notion that perhaps it would be good to read a book that doesn't dissapoint you at the end, because there isn't an ending.

Lisa ran into Mark's arms sobbing wildly. Mark stepped back and gently pushed her away, realising there were only two words that could make Lisa understand why they couldn't be together.
NOTE FROM AUTHOR: make up the ending yourself.

I should really submit that to Mills and Boon.

Side note: morning TV is seriously going down hill.

Ciao,
Gemini
xoxo

Bed ridden

Ah, here is a nice bloggish topic!
I have been really sick for the past two weeks, at first I thought it was a cold, but alas, the stars had a different idea. Mum has been going on about the moon, because it's small or something, so things have been going wrong. I just nod my head, smile, and bite my tongue to avoid laughing. Here I am, bed ridden and sick as a dog, though I never really have understood that expression. I haven't met that many sick dogs. I guess I sound like a dog, with all this coughing, is that what it means? Or is there some international sick dog convention I don't know about? If so, that is terrible, and the RSPCA should really get onto it. This is awful, I sincerely apologize and I will casually move on to a different train of thought. Where I live, there isn't much help, in the way of medical-ness, but we do have a helipad, which my grandparents organised so their old pilot friends could come over for a shin-dig. I really hope it doesn't come to being airlifted out, because although I'd appreciate the drama of it all, being a dramatic soul, I think it would be a little overkill. Mum is getting increasingly concerned though, as demonstrated by her forcing a pill down my throat this morning at 7:05 AM.

She also wants to take me to the hospital tonight. Ah, the hospital, to save myself the indignity, I won't mention the town I live in, but the hospital there is like all hospitals, awful. Firstly, you pretty much know everyone there, so you have to sit in the waiting room answering everyone's questions about your aunt, and your garden, and rainfall, and weeds. Everyone avoids the fact that they are in the accident and emergency waiting room so they don't ask why you are there, humourously dodging the question. Then you have to wait for 5 hours until you get seen by a doctor, by which time you are so sick from being around so many sick people that you have forgotten why you went to the hospital in the first place. As you can tell, I have been to this hospital many times, I could show the most comfortable waiting seat, the cleanest leaning corner, the most enjoyable toy to play with, the least torn magazine to read. My Dad used to work there, and in addition, from my Judo days, I broke every bone in my arm and my legs at one point or another.

The thing is, I want to stay home tonight, a much as I adore that waiting room, the UAC offers come out, and if I don't get into UTS like I really really really want to, I think I'll need to organise an emergency evacuation plan, because I'll be stuck in this town!

Right, well that's enough for now. I love all three of my lovely readers, so here's to you Mrs Robinson.
xoxo

I am a virgin to blogging

Blogging kind of scares me. I'm not really sure where to start, so I'll put the beginning of a story I wrote on here.

It never really was like that. I never sat down and said to myself, "Right, this is what I'm going to do." I never thought at all. It all happened so quickly, before I knew it I was there. Words are funny things. I use to stare at them and divide a word into two parts. If there was an odd number of letters I'd keep trying until I could cut the word in two. I could control the word and the letters that it consisted of. I can control you too, I bet that I can, as easily as I can control words. I'm not crazy, I'm scared. I don't do that with the words anymore. I'm scared that the next word will be impossible to split, that no matter how hard I try the word will stay as one entity, determined to regain control over me.
If you were to ask me how it began, I wouldn't know where the starting point was. How far back would I need to go?
When I was fourteen the light was a different colour. A blue-ish green perhaps, mysterious, fresh and untouched. I remember stepping outside into the wind, seeing the others walking as one, their footsteps together making one beat. Suddenly I would become conscious of every movement my body was making. My neck. My feet. My head. My hands, where were they? You see, at fourteen, little existed apart from my own world in which I was only just starting to understand. There I was, walking as normally as I could while I was conscious that my hands were swinging cutting through the air on each side of my body, when I was interrupted.

Well that's it for my first post!! Psych!

xo
P.S The photo is one I took in Queensland. It has nothing to do with this post. See? I'm new to this!

Interrogation

Now school is over I have time for the more important things, the things that really matter.
Such as interrogatingly stupid questionares.

TELL US ABOUT YOU
*Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake*: What a sneaky way to find out someone’s age!
*Date that you regularly blow them out (birthday):* March the 5th July the 2nd and September 10th. Third time lucky, so if I do it three times I might actually blow them all out.
*Pets*: Never had one, except when I was four I had a goldfish called Otto
*Height*: The same height as an elephant lying sideways. Same weight too.
*Eye color*: I’m blue ab a dee ab a di
*Hair Color*: Depends which day it is.
*Piercing*: Ears, I felt so grown up when I had them done. Last year.

HAVE YOU EVER...?
*Had the drink Calypso Breeze*? Is that a liquid detergent?
*Been in love*? Is that a sitcom?
*Been toilet-papering*? Okay, I dread to think what that is.
*Loved somebody so much it makes you cry*? Bob the builder has that effect on me.

THE FUTURE:
*School*: Non- existent
*Where You Want To Live*: Egypt
*How Many Kids You Want*: 8
*girl names*: Sharlene, Darlene, Marlene and Carlene.
*boy names*: Shane, Dane, Mane and Cane.
*What Kind Of Job You Want*: Marshmellow factory product tester
*You Want To Get Married*: Nah, I’d rather be a hermit on mount buffalo.

WHICH ONE?
*Croutons or Bacon Bits*: Ewww they both sound gross when they are in writing like that
*2 doors or 4 (on a car)*: 4
*Mr. Pibb or Dr. Pepper*: Who is Mr Pibb? Neither, I don’t trust either of these men.
*Coffee or Ice-cream*: ICE- CREAM.
*Shampoo or Conditioner*: Conditioner
*Bridges or Tunnels*: Bridges
*One pillow or two*: Two, one is for sleeping one the other is for protecting yourself against intruders
*Adidas or Nike*: Nike
*Nike or Reebok*: There’s a difference?
*Adidas or Reebok*: AAH I have no idea

WORD ASSOCIATION (FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND)
*Rock*: Baby
*Green*: Soup*
Wet*: Sky
*Cry*: Lint
*Peanut Butter*: Dead. Yes I know my mind is strange.

FAVORITES:
*Salad Dressing*: None
*Color of socks*: LOL! Sorry but seriously WHO CARES what colour socks they wear?*Memory*: When I bunjee jumped off a bridge in Cairns because my grandpa said he’d teach me how to make fudge if I did it.
*toothpaste*: Colgate for kids
*Food*: Marshmellows
*Song at the moment*: Crazy by Gnarles Barkley
*TV show*: That’s so Raven
*Toothbrush*: WHAT
*Subject in School*: Lunch
*Flower*: Rose
*Color*: Purple
*Sport to Watch*: Boxing
*Country Song*: Life is a boot by random non existent country singer
*Sesame Street Character*: Elmo should be shot. Zoe.
*Disney Character*: The Beast in Beauty in the beast
*Warner Brothers*: Je ne sais pas.

RANDOM QUESTIONS
*When was your last hospital check in*: Yesterday, I checked out. Arm in a sling, typing with one hand.
*Do You Drink*: Yes, I quite like lemonade and creaming soda. How come the question Do you drink? rules out other liquid substances that people pour down their throats?
*Where do you see your self in 10 years?*: In a pub in Ireland
*Have you ever been convicted of a crime*? No, and I can’t be bothered writing a sarcastic comment about that one either
*Which single store would you choose to max your credit card*? Woolworths
*What type of car you drive now*? Dad’s world war two fire truck
*What do you do most often when you are bored*? This thing which is making me more bored
*Are You In A Gang Or Club*: Gang – it’s called the white shirts gang and we constantly have water fights
*Motorcycles*: yes???
*What Is Your Favorite Kind Of Clothes*: The covering kind. I like Mum’s clothes, they are a lot skimpier than mine
*Are You Close Minded*: HAHAHAH is that even a word? It certainly isn’t the opposite of open minded
*Are You Open Minded*: Not really
*Are You A Player*: of the piano, yes
*Can u be in love w/2 people at the same time*? Nah, too confusing
*Bedtime*: define please?
*Humiliating Moment*: Oh way too many


Ya that was really not fun. I'm watching Maid in Manhattan with Jennifer Lopez - great chick flick. I have no idea how to do this blogging thing!!